Romain Rolland in Jean-Christophe
So many men – they have no opinions except in so far as they disapprove of all the enthusiastic opinions. But if a man is to be independent, he has to stand alone and how many men are there who are capable of that? How many men are there even amongst the clear-sighted who will dare to break free of the bondage of certain prejudices, certain postulates which cramp and fetter all the men of the same generation? That would mean setting up a wall between themselves and others, on one hand, freedom in the wilderness, on the other, mankind. They do not hesitate. They choose mankind, the herd. The herd is evil-smelling but it gives warmth. Then those who have chosen pretend to think, do not in fact think. It is not very difficult for them. They know so little what they think! “Know thy-self” How could they, those men, who have hardly a ‘me’ to know. In every collective belief, religious or social very rare are the men who believe, because very rare the men who are men. Faith is a heroic force; its fire has kindled but very few human hearts.
Above paragraph was told in his book and I read it in Musings by Chalam (My favorite Telugu writer) and I used this in my script Poornima too.
The point I am trying to make is, few are men who had faith and did what they wanted to. I want to be in the league that believed in themselves and did what they wanted to. All these years, since my birth I have done actually nothing but write and learn photography. I love writing (from Shayari to poetry to movie script to lyrics of a song) and then photography. Now, the time has come to pursue this.
My dream is to tell a story that I want to see. To make a movie what I want to see. Let it be what no one is interested in, but I am interested in it and I will make all my effort and give my blood and sweat to make it the way I want to. UN-compromised Cinema is the new term. OK, so here is my plan; quit the organization and software industry, start narrating the script to producers and convince him that my story is worth to be told and made. (damn software industry, I saw more politics than work here, but this is not that is driving me to move out, it's my passion which is the driving force) and start-up with the movie-making. I have got people who have a fire in them to work in a project that they are interested in and have got people who want to run away from the software industry too to make their own mark in the film industry. But, I am one who is running away from what he is doing now to make his only dream come true.
What if things go well, I will be telling stories all my life and I will be happy as I am living my dream. Only very few souls in this world are privileged to do so. There are 90 failure stories and 10 success stories; I am willing to be a part of both than dying without even strife.
What if things fail, I will starve, I will be ripped off by the people around me and I will be looked down as one who should not be respected and I will be cursed, I will be taken as an example to be looked down upon and they may term me a loser and the as the worst part my parents may even disown me (nothing worse than this, I see) and eventually I will die in the strife which is also fine.
Things are so easy to write and told but it’s so tough to face them, how will a day be when I am shivering in cold on a footpath or running for the water to quench my thirst on a scorching day. I am game for both coz I have never seen any hardships in life my parents were generous and gave all I needed when I needed (the prime most thing being education) and even I did get everything in life without ever struggling for it, I was given this job at a campus interview and maybe that’s why I do not value this much or maybe because of my passion and dream of so much of kicking this off, I am holding onto it and striving to make my own place.
So let’s see where time will take me but I am going to pursue filmmaking, I have got scripts ready, camera-ready and the team set up, get a producer and start making films (I am ready to give all my life for it). How prepared I am, I asked this myself time and again and now I am saying to myself YES I AM MORE THAN PREPARED. How many may disagree but I am starting things.
So bye-bye herd, I am going to fetch the freedom in the wilderness and hopefully, I will find it or may die in the strife. I am a game.
All this while, I am accused of just talking and not doing any substantial work. Now, the time has come for me to start doing and stop talking.
Wait and Watch for better things to come by.
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